What are age-related existential crises?

Unlike situational crises caused by specific external events (like losing a job or getting a divorce), age-related existential crises are tied to the natural stages of human development. They happen when we come face to face with the core realities of existence: mortality, freedom of choice and responsibility, unavoidable loneliness, and the search for meaning. At certain points in our lives, these issues become especially urgent, forcing us to rethink our values and goals.

Common age-related existential crises and how they show up:

• The Teenage Crisis (roughly ages 12-18):
  • Signs: Rebellion, self-discovery, rejecting authority, and questions like “Who am I?”, “Where do I fit in?”, and “Can I just be myself?”. Teens experiment with different roles and styles as they try to find their own identity and separate from their parents.
  • Existential issues: Freedom from parental control, taking responsibility for their own actions, and realizing their unique self.
• The Quarter-Life Crisis (roughly ages 20-30):
  • Signs: Uncertainty about their path (career, education, relationships), feeling “stuck,” comparing themselves to others their age, and fear of failing to reach their potential. They might ask, “Is this the life I actually wanted?”.
  • Existential issues: Taking responsibility for their choices, building an authentic life, and realizing the consequences of their decisions.
• The Mid-life Crisis (roughly ages 35-55):
  • Signs: Re-evaluating achievements and losses, realizing physical strength is fading, fear of aging and death, and searching for new meaning after hitting “old” goals (like raising kids or building a career). This often brings a desire for radical change and doubts about whether they’ve lived their life correctly.
  • Existential issues: Mortality, the fact that time is limited, rethinking life’s purpose, and finding new goals.
• The Later-life Crisis (after age 60-65):
  • Signs: Realizing death is getting closer, losing loved ones, changing social roles (retirement), declining health, and looking back on life. This can lead to feelings of loneliness and regret over things left undone.
  • Existential issues: Mortality, summing up one’s life, accepting the past, and finding meaning in the time that remains.

The role of a crisis psychologist in support:

As a crisis psychologist, my job isn’t to “cure” an existential crisis, because it isn’t an illness. Instead, I help the client:

• Acknowledge and accept their feelings and deep questions.
• Explore where their inner discomfort is coming from and how it relates to getting older.
• Find new meaning and values that fit their current stage of life.
• Create strategies to adapt to new realities and challenges.
• Turn the crisis into an opportunity for deep personal growth and being more true to themselves.

Remember, going through an existential crisis is a natural part of being human. It’s a challenge that can ultimately lead to a more conscious, rich, and meaningful life.